A bad incident calls for a better reaction!

Sometimes things just happen without giving any scope to react to avoid them.

So, there I was happy around 8 in evening, that after so many days I was about to reach home early. So there I was, with my car stopped at the traffic signal. And a concrete mixer truck comes from my right and swerved left to take the left turn. I couldn't move either forward or backward (vehicles behind) and it grazed past my car's right front part.

So helpless! So frustrated! Felt like blurting out the entire abuse vocab, I possess. But of no use. I reversed a bit back to avoid further damage. The truck found the space it needed and sped away. I crossed the red light, rested my car to the left side of the road. Bumper swinging down, both right indicators gone, metal sheet dented a couple of inches inside, and a whole lot of frustration, anger and somberness.

Everybody plays the role of spectator so often. But when you turn a mere spectator to the things happening to you, it feels bad, very very bad. We start to think futile things. If only I had stayed in office 5 minutes longer, if only I had driven a couple of minutes faster, if only I taken a separate route and all other futile Ifs.

Then I got myself reminded about the 20-80 rule. It says 20% of things happening to us have got our no control on them. 80% others depend on how we react. The principle can be understood by following example (mention in the mail)

You are having breakfast with your family.
Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee
Onto your business shirt.


You have no control over what has just happened.

What happens next will be determined by how you react.




You curse.

You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over.

She breaks down in tears.

After scolding her, you turn to your wife

and you criticize her for placing the cup

too close to the edge of the table.

A short verbal battle follows.

You storm upstairs and change your shirt.

Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying
to finish her breakfast and getting ready to go to school.

She misses the bus.

Your spouse must leave immediately for work.

You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.

Because you are late, you drive 40 miles per hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone.

After a 15-minute delay and throwing

$60.00 traffic fine away, you arrive at school.

Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye.

After arriving at the office 20 minute late,

You realize you forgot your briefcase.



Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse.
You look forward to coming home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge
in your relationship with your wife and daughter.



Why?

Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?

B) Did your daughter cause it?

C) Did the policeman cause it?

D) Did you cause it?

The answer is “D”



You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.




Here is what could have and should have happened

Coffee splashes over you.

Your daughter is about to cry.

You gently say:

“It’s okay, honey, you just need to be

More careful next time.”

Grabbing a towel you go upstairs and change your shirt.
You grab your briefcase, and you come back down in time to look through

the window and see your child getting on the bus.

She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early a cheerfully greet the staff.


Notice the difference?




So now I am a bit more relaxed than my initial state of mind..... :-)

Begaani Shaadi mein Abdullah Deewana- Part2

I received some feedbacks about some instances which deserved some mention, but slipped off from my mind.

It was last day of end-semester examination and one of my dear friends, Rahul (Guy with the blushing smile in my blog-header pic, fell ill. I, Panda, and Pandu set off along with him to make sure he reaches Gurgaon safely where his parents were waiting to take him Faridabad, their home.

Uncle said - "So nice of you guys that you came till here to see Rahul off". We all smiled. We knew we came so that we could crash in some wedding parties around.

Anyways, that night was one of the longest times spent to find our target. As from our previous experiences we ignored low key affairs and looked for the "Grand Arrangement".

We were very tired, thinking the bike we borrowed from one of our seniors, Tiwari, had drunk petrol worth of more than our one time lavish meal at Chawla's. Disappointed we were about to return, when we saw firecrackers soaring in the sky about 2 kms ahead. Our eyes lit up. Both Pandu and I vroomed our bikes and reached the venue. Wow "Sabr ka phal meetha hi hota hai", seemed true.

BTW (Bittu tikki Wala) had a dedicated gallery, with about 2 dozens of chat-papdi and other snacks. I was (and am) a teetotaler, but my accomplices had their mouths watering when they saw "Teacher's" on the open-pub's racks. Sadly panda couldn't have much of it, but I guess he gulped one peg. Enough for him. Pandu on the other didn't need to drive. So tried all the brands he could.

Panda then pointed out towards a tuna fish which was getting grilled and said "!@#$$@!$ itti badi macchi....hic...". I and Pandu apprised him about it being called a Tuna.

All three were constantly "tadoing" pretty (read sexy) girls. People started noticing us suspiciously. Pandu was so scared, his all hangover went for a toss. He wanted to return before the feared beating by bride's relatives. But Panda and I were daring enough. We moved about confidently discussing about our respective businesses.

After our stomachs-full and late in night we drove back to hostel. Returned one of the bikes to its owner....Panda said - "MAJAA AA GAYA KHANA KHAKE", the famous dialogue in "Matrubhumi". We IMAOed (laughed hard and continuously) and then went to sleep.

:-)

Begaani Shaadi mein Abdullah Deewana!!

Hmm...One of my dear friends had published a blog entry about how he felt about being uninvited at some occasions. This reminded me of those uncountable dinners we had at weddings parties in Gurgaon and other nearby farmhouses. Here is the summary of all those wonderful (read delicious) moments:

Hmmm...On April 21, 2004 (Thanks Google) Virender Sehwag wedded Arti Ahlawat (thanks again) along with 41,812 couples (I am a Data Analyst).

So there was I, at the Khoka, relishing my plate of maggi along with senior friends from 3rd and 4th year. Nikhil Sharma, one amongst them, suggested wedding-crashing, when I told him about so many weddings in the city. I was game for it. I put on my only remaining ironed half shirt, borrowed a pair of trousers we set off for our "great wedding search".

We found one. When I got down from bike, he asked me to wait until the Groom's Convoy arrived. That sounded like a plan!

It arrived and we too sneaked in with it. So as course had its way, Bride's relatives thought us to be Groom's relatives and vice versa. We straightaway headed for snacks corner. Then took some soft drinks/shakes and followed it with some main course and dessert.

It seemed that videographer knew more than what we did about ourselves and I am sure we would have shared the screen space 50% of the total video duration.

Sorry Amit bhaiya and Anjali bhabhi. Now you would have figured whose side the two guys with ice-creams filled in mouth, belonged.

When I graduated to 2nd year I was a veteran, and guys wanted me to lead them into wedding-crashing. Our excuse - "Mess food is bad". But more than that reason, I liked the sense of thrill we had all the time when we were bent down on trying everything meant for the bellies within a limited stipulated time.

Once confident we didn’t wait for Baraat to get in. We used to roam in confidently, passing by Bride's father and uncles, mobiles on ears, saying - "Yes mom I have reached. U and Dad in their? Yeah I located you. Coming there"

Once we landed up in a reception party with barely 70 guests. But I in fact, managed to engage into conversation with one of the uncles about how good dance performance was.

Sorry to all those couples for appearing uninvited in their weddings!!

Thank you Pradeep bhaiya, Priyanka bhabhi, Deepa didi, Ashok Jeeju, Aakash Uncle, Sanjeevni Aunty (wedded in their late 30s I guess)



HMMMMM....I WISH WE HAD CLICKED SOME PICS!! :-(

A trip to the countryside!!

A trip which had an unfortunate beginning (my grandpa expired) turned out to be an enriching experience.

My mum had left early at the onset of hearing the saddening news. Grandpa was ailing for than a year now. So in some corner of one's heart everybody felt contentment as he was relieved of all the pain and agony he suffered.

Dad and I went 4 days after. Located about 30 kms from the Nepal-India (Bihar) border, its one of the places where I feel complete peace of mind.




My mamu, mami and their kids (read Raakshas Sena) joined us on our way to Nanigaon.
I managed to survive them and their zillion questions which seemed straight out of 100 yrs of possible history of "who wants to be a millionaire"

We reached there next morning and I got into the groove the same day. Got my pic clicked doing my own bit for the cause.




It was a 5-Village community dinner (bhoj) next day. Preparation was to be done by everyone in family.




Massive event requires massive arrangements. As this cooked rice storage:




And a few sweets:


And the server: :-)


2 mornings later I went to one of my nanaji's cousins, a maithil sahitya scholar. He told me about the origin, history, development of Mithila culture. I was too impressed by the knowledge he granted me.

Then we left for my Dadigaon (Paternal grandparents' home). On way I saw the changing facets of Bihar. Transport, roads communication everything is developing at a fast pace. Thanks to Nitish Kumar, Bihar is out of Clutches of Lalu for at least 5 years.

Now a very unique pic. Only one of its kind. This is a bridge over Kamla River. Uniqueness lies in the fact that both Road Transport and the Railways use the common bridge. I might be prosecuted for publishing this pic. :-( The bridge is property of Railways and hence is still awaiting its maintenance, courtesy Shri Lalu Yadav.



We visited the old and locally very famous Shiv Mandir, which is still to get its recognition at national level. UGNA MAHADEV (the complete story will be published in some other post)



That marked the end of a very enriching experience. The one I was going to use for my MBA GD/PI Interviews. I converted one ...FMS..(hurray) waiting for 10th April. Wish me luck.

:-(

Feeling Blue!!!

Who let the Dog out?? Danny ??

Christopher Nolan must be very proud with how well the "Anachronous" way of story-telling been down with the masses. Filmmakers and viewers are now acknowledging the great art, which can make simple stories look extra-ordinary.

Kudos to Danny for showing the slums as they are. I don't see any great bollywood actor making so much fuss about it without even giving it a peek. That too when the child actor in the film jumps into the shit-hole (literally) to get his autograph (though later sold off by his brother at Rs 3 only).

Chase scene (policemen after the kids playing on airport) has been shot exceptionally well. Both the child actors Ayush Mahesh Khedekar (Jamal) and Azharuddin Ismail (his elder bro Salim) and their adolescent counterparts have made their characters look real.

From slums to the mumbai riots (brief hints) to trap by "Beggars' Mafia" to escape to losing-founding saga to bhai turning hitman everything is shot convincingly as this was going to be the film's backbone as they explain how did the Slumdog know the answers.

Somewhere down the line the characters (the adolescent guys) speaking English couldn't go down as well as those who did in Gandhi. For perhaps if not had been that way film might have ended up with competing in "Best Foreign Film" category.
But as a movie is best owned by its director, so no issues.

Freida Pinto's performance is average. Dev Patel does impress a lot with his journey from chaiwallaah in a call centre, who knows more about the Red Carpet than any other student in the training room to The Millionaire, who ended up annoying Anil Kapoor with his rags to riches story in 1 hr Show rather than latter's struggle (briefly mentioned). The grey shades in the Quiz-Master's role might have driven Shahrukh away from it.

Time for some technical flaws.

The KBC or "Who wants to be a millionaire" is never live, for the fear, that if a person choses phone a friend, encarta/wiki can help him before even the call is made.

How often "The Three Musketeers" taught in a Slum-School?

Policemen grilling Jamal speak in so much an Indian accent english. So how does our Slumdog acquire a foreign accent? Even if our chaiwaalah learned that in the office he served, but how does our heroin who had been at a Mafia's place since years. And we know what accent is borne in there?

How often a person of Lower strata of society when plays reality shows like this, are insulted by the game host?


Amidst all the flaws, the story does strike a chord for the majority of the 120 minutes, losing steam only in final 10 minutes.

The film will inspire a generation of directors and story-writers, seeing kind of media exposure it is getting across the globe.

Go watch slumdog for the Oscar nominations. For some seemingly funny but realistically agonizing slum life. For the great soundtrack courtesy A.R. Rehman.

I genuinely feel It should win an Oscar for India. Feel like "It's Written"


***

A very happy new year!!!!

A very happy new year to me and all.

A very happy bdday to me (5th Jan)...

Congratualtions (for managing an IIM GD/PI Call) and Best of Luck (for conversion) to me.

Next post will be a Movie Review of Chandni Chowk to China.....

Cheers